A Republican in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked  

the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the  

restaurant and asked, 'Is that Jesus sitting over  

there?'? The waitress nodded 'yes,' so the Republican requested that she  

give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him.  

The next patron to come in was a Libertarian with a hunched back. He  

shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked  

the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant  

and asked, 'Is that Jesus over there?' The waitress nodded, so the  

Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, 'My treat.'  

The third patron to come int o the restaurant was a Democrat on crutches.  

He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, 'Hey there, Honey!  

How's about getting' me a cold glass of Miller Light?' He, too, looked  

across the restaurant and asked, 'Is that Jesus over there?'  

The waitress once more nodded, so the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a  

cold glass of beer. 'On my bill,' he said.  

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him and said,  

'For your kindness, you are healed.' The Republican felt the  

strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door.  

Jesus also passed by the Libertarian, touched him and said, 'For your  

kindness, you are healed.' The Libertarian felt his back straightening up,  

and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out  

the door.  

As Jesus walked towards the Democrat. The man suddenly jumped up and yelled, 'Don't touch me! I'm collecting a disability!'